Father’s Day: Knowing You Matter is Everything

Father & son. They have each other’s back.

With Father’s Day this coming weekend, I once again asked my husband what Father’s Day means to him. His feelings might have changed over the years as the children got older, but no, he’s felt this way since they were small, “To have your children recognize you. That’s all that counts.” I know this is true as I watch his face light up when the phone rings that day… twice. He’s crazy about his kids.

As a father, Bill is the best of the best. And my son is following in his dad’s footsteps with his own two children. Clearly… caring and respect begets caring and respect.

My own dad is no longer alive, but I rather wish I could talk to him now. We weren’t very close, but maybe we could’ve finally worked a few things out. I was a little pixie of a kid with an insatiable curiosity, living in a house where obedience was required. Feelings were seldom aired there, but would have meant the world to me.

Christy & Dad. They have each other’s back.

I’m grateful that my children love their dad so much, and they know — for sure — that the feeling is mutual. He has their back and they know it. Gifts are never necessary. All that matters is knowing you matter, especially to those you gave your heart and soul to.

We had dear friends who once asked us, “How do we stay relevant in our daughter’s life?” They had just spent three days on a trip to visit their daughter and her husband, whose necks were mostly bent forward in a classic cell phone posture. Really, nothing makes me feel as useless as being treated like I’m not even there. It’s a cell phone culture, but I much prefer the company and conversation of a human over a little device in my lap. Oh oh, I feel a rant coming on. (A subject for another time.)

Sunday is Father’s Day and I’m feeling the urge to sit down with old photo albums and smile, page by page, at the parenting years. I’m old school about memories. I like the photos in my lap, not on the screen.

SECRET: If you have a good relationship with your dad, let him know you care. If words like “I love you” tend to stick in your throat, a 5-minute call with small talk does the trick. Anything works that says he matters to you, but hearing it out loud warms more hearts. Knowing that you matter, there’s nothing better.