I don’t want to move anymore! The patience it takes for that whole process has “left the building!” I keep reminding myself that the upside to settling in a new town is the opportunity to explore and to meet new people but, darn, I miss my old people! The loss I’ve felt since this, our 7th move, comes and goes. And when it comes, loneliness settles on me like the heavy fog of a January morning.

While intentions are good, once you’re out of sight, your face eventually gets lost in the busyness of those lives you’re leaving behind. If this sounds like whining, well… it is. I try always to uplift with my writing, but maybe a whiny post once in a while won’t get the devil on my back. ha.

Losing the frequency of get-togethers is one thing, but losing communication all together–with many good friends over over the years– just makes me sad. My optimistic self says letting go of the people you used to see will make way for new ones. While this might be true, and I’ve met some dandies, the disappointment persists as I stubbornly resist. We had such good times together and it’s hard not to want this again.

Those final good-byes, where everyone agrees to stay in touch, have mostly turned to “out of sight, out of mind”. Inevitable, I guess, I admire those who only need a bit of nature to enrich their lives, but I need more than a squirrel to keep me company. I’m a diehard people person who cherishes social interactions.

“Grief” is a word that is mostly associated with the loss of a loved one. But any significant change brings with it a loss. Losing a loved one is wrenching and takes a lot of time to heal, losing friends takes less.

I tried to sum up the breadth of loss in the introduction to my book Emerging from the Heartache of Loss, “Since we’ve been coping with loss all our lives, ever since we had to give up that warm, cozy place inside Mom’s belly, you’d think we’d get used to it. After all, most major changes in life carry with them a loss… of the way it used to be… of the person we used to have in our lives. Eventually, we all have to adjust when love ones die, dreams disappear, health turns sour, or relationships change. We lose moms, dads, children, husbands, wives, siblings, grandparents… our soldiers… our unborn. We lose pets, jobs, our nest eggs, and somethings even our sanity. The volume of pain is stunning.”’

Moving is one of the top reasons people experience that sense of loss. I used to think it was about all the chaos and disruption of packing up and leaving a house behind, but maybe it’s the fear of leaving friendships behind.

I don’t want to move anymore!